The art of dating when you are in your 40’s is a perilous, soul destroying mission. I blame my misfortune with men on the 'fairy tale factor'... That never ending belief that love conquers all and that one day a prince will come.

Reality isn't even close to the fairy tale. Especially when the prince doesn’t just come with baggage – he comes with a bitter, money grubbing ex-wife clinging to his back like a hump.

I gave it a shot. It sucked. I suffered a potential serial killer teenager who would pick his nose and wipe it on the wall. I gained 15 kilo; became invisible to the world. Yeah; I don’t think I’ll do that again.

Thursday, April 23, 2015


It's hard to be normal.  Well, normal like.  I'm going back to work on Monday and I'll admit I'm fearful.  Its been 5 months; just over that.  The reality is that I have worked there for 10 + years and have no friends.  The only couple of people who have emailed me at home, don't work in our department.

So the reality is, leave this place.  Gather my wits about me and leave.  Seriously look for a job this time!

So I'm going back to work.

This ought to be fun....

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Ground Hogs Day

Excuse me, but I’m royally pissed off.  I knew I worked for a pack of dogs, but didn’t realise it was so bad…

The HR manager replied to my brother.  It seemed that she has no care if I starve, or have to hook for my next meal – so long as Monash Health don’t have to pay for it.

She started with the “fluff”, or what they were doing for me… Basically, it is giving my desk away (under the scope of “see look how much they care about her!”  Working on one, instead of multiple projects (which has nothing to do with my boss glad to be rid of me and Tao, the angel, wanting me); and that they had done everything they could.

Well.  You didn’t figure on me.  I have nothing to do.  No where to go!  Nothing I have to be at!!!!!  But taking them down will be a pleasure.

I didn't want it.  I wanted them to pay me while I get 'back to work'; but if you think I'm so brain damaged I'd back away from a fight - you're delusional!!!!

Sunday, April 19, 2015

Home and beyond!!!

I am home.  Yay!!

A 8 day stint in hospital will cure anyone!  If the doctors don't fix you, the meals will sure as Hell get you on your way.

Actually it was, in the end, Monash Health and Doctor Dank that fixed me.

Since I have no memory of my last stint at Monash, only my sisters and daughters, I'm reluctant to attend at emergency.  Who am I kidding... I fought tooth and nail not to go there. And yet one day and they had the answer, unlike the cowardly lions at St Vincent's.  For the record, it was not my brain but my anti depressants! I'd had them for two weeks. Looks like I'm back to wishing I was dead; way better that the last week.

But I can't stop thinking that my life is so much more difficult now.  Brain Damage; which isn't nearly as bad as it was, but is bad enough.  My life has changed - but I am looking at the positives.  I no longer at the depths of despair of high as a kite.  I'm more even.  I stop to smell the roses; but didn't before.

I haven't worked out the other positives yet, but I will list them on here.