Depression. Thy name is Me.

I woke up this morning feeling okay.  I mean I had decided to test the water with the yank.  I think I had decided that when I saw the wheels falling off the Moodle on Saturday; brain damaged I may be but even I can see what it means when he who lives by his phone, doesn't answer me.

So 12+ years and I get an email.  Wow.

He blamed my reaction to the kid, but hey, I don't want to live with the kid.  I wrote in my blog that his snot wiping episode was revolting.  News flash Moodle; it was!  I was planning my thing; we were living as singles til January anyhow; he could have taken as long as he liked.

I called my sister on the way home and she reminded me of the past.  The Moodle not believing anything I said when up against the kid.  The horrible emails he had written.
And; when all is said and done; the bit I can't escape.
He didn't go to my Dad's funeral.

I wonder why I can't just cut the ribbon; slice the cord.
I did love him, but maybe that is it.  Letting go and moving on seems so hard.  It always has.  Like the PI; I went back multiple times.  Like everyone; I always go back...

An email for 12+ years.  The end is worth only that...